Allow me to inform you about one Michael McKenna. This chap, who graced this earth first on the 4th of January 1991, hails from our beloved Scotland. Now 33 and presumably in the throes of a midlife crisis, McKenna trots about in the midfield, often darting around as a central attacking midfielder for the football powerhouse Falkirk. He sports the number 14 jersey. Towering at a colossal 5 feet 10 inches (1.78m for you modern folk), he tips the scales at a rather unremarkable 11 stone 9 pounds, or 74kg if you'd rather.
Now, let's talk cash. According to the fine folks at Transfermarkt, our dear McKenna is worth a whopping ยฃ170k, give or take. His contract at Falkirk, set to expire quicker than your interest in this piece on 31 May 2025, has around 8 months left on it.
Let's journey back to July 2014, where our hero, presumably younger and thinner, moved from the cozy confines of Musselburgh Athletic's junior squad to the big leagues in Livingston. In his thrilling debut season, he laced his boots 25 times, finding the net once.
Bored of Livingston by June 2015, he up sticks and moved across to Berwick Rangers, another behemoth of football in the Lowland league. McKenna certainly enjoyed himself there, managing appearances and goals as consistently as trains manage to run behind schedule in Scotland. Three seasons of impressive tenacity at Berwick Rangers saw McKenna make 80 first team appearances and knock in a staggering 13 goals.
Perhaps eager for a change of fish and chips shop, McKenna found himself at Arbroath in January 2018, courtesy of a transfer deal as undisclosed as the Loch Ness Monster's existence. With two seasons under his belt at Arbroath, replete with 58 appearances and 9 goals, McKenna presumably decided he'd had enough of Arbroath's undoubtedly thrilling nightlife.
July 2024, and McKenna's seemingly aimless journey across Scottish football clubs had him landing at Falkirk. So far in the current season, heโs blessed the pitch seven times in league matches and made a grand total of five cameo appearances in the League Cup. If you're keeping track... well, you've certainly got more patience than I do.
