Let's talk about our continental friend, Youssef Chermiti. Born on the 24th of May 2004 in Portugal, making him a mere 21 years old. He's a bit taller than your average milkman, standing at a lofty 6'3" (1.92m), and weighs in at a respectable 13st 3lb (84kg). Currently, Chermiti is loitering about at the Rangers, where he proudly wears the number 9 jersey, a forward by trade, principally seen gallivanting about on the pitch as a striker.
A glance over at Transfermarkt reveals that Chermiti has somehow managed to whip up a market value of about £5m. I suppose football really isn't played with a calculator on the pitch, now is it?
He was initially spotted skulking about in July 2016 as a trainee at Sporting CP in Portugal. By some miracle, in his debut 2022-2023 season at the Portuguese outfit, Chermiti got himself onto the pitch 16 times in league matches and even managed to score thrice. Apparently, that was enough for someone over at Everton who decided to spend the equivalent of the GDP of a small nation, or as they call it in Fleet Street, around £11m, to bring him over to the Premier League.
At Everton, things started promisingly. Chermiti made 18 first team appearances in 2023-2024, a respectable showing indeed. But then, in the following 2024-2025 season, it was as if he'd been afflicted with some sort of invisible ailment. He only showed up in Everton blue four times. There must've been some terrible calamity at Goodison Park or perhaps Chermiti just forgot where it was?
Subsequently, in September 2025, someone in the accounting department of Rangers decided they had money to burn, and saw fit to sign Chermiti from Everton, splurging around £8m in the process. In his current season wearing whatever colour Rangers wear these days, Chermiti has managed 15 appearances and even scored four goals in league matches. That must be a pleasant change, actually seeing the goalposts, right Youssef?
He's also been spotted kicking about in the League Cup 2025-2026, making one start and one appearance as a substitute. In the Europa League, he's put in a similarly unspectacular performance with five starts and one appearance as a sub. One does wonder what he's getting paid for, but then again, who am I to judge?
